For those of you dying to know - I kid myself ;) The p-test (what an accurate abbreviation!) was a BFN. Negative. I think it actually laughed at me both times I dug it out of the garbage to make sure another line didn't show up. I was going to do a long depressing post about how disappointed I am, but... I need to find a good mood from somewhere. I have to teach tonight. So I will try to save my depression for tomorrow when I have no other-worldly obligations.
So on to the post having nothing to do with not being pregnant this month.
I have reprimanded my 11-year old daughter many many times about taking her time when she does things. She is constantly tearing open packages beyond the ziplock, opening packages upside down... spilling things out in her hurry to get the package open.
Cut to this morning. Little man has climbed over the safety gate, into the kitchen, got himself into his booster seat and buckled himself up and is requesting "marshmewows, marshmewows, marshmewows, nebo smoot snacks, nebo smoot snacks (Nemo fruit snacks), marshmewows, marshmewows, banowna bar (granola bar), marshmewows, marshmewows..." while I'm trying to make my coffee.
So I, under much duress, am trying to open a new bag of his marshmellow cereal (which, yes, he will only eat the marshmellows out of) as quickly as possible so that he will cease with the raving 3 year old rant...
What happens? Of course, I tear open the bag past the ziplock! Out pops little chocolate balls and marshmellows.
And then what happens? My potty mouth gets the better of me and I say "son of a big fat bitch" because of course it couldn't have just been shit or damn or anything less colorful.
And what does little man pick out of that phrase to repeat?
"mama's a fat bitch, mama's a fat bitch"
I wish I was making that up.
I turned my head so he couldn't see me giggling like a jr. high school girl... and so he would quit repeating that asap! God I hope he forgets that one really really quick!
What am I teaching these kids? Give me a bar of Lava soap quick!
Writer’s Workshop: Like A Drifter
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