Friday, June 4, 2010

Once More With Time!

Ugh. Time. Most days it seems to be my worst enemy. I don't think it's ever come anywhere near to being even an old acquaintance. Time and money seem to be the two things I always wish I had more of ;) But of course, money is another topic altogether...

One day I posted as my status update that I would love to have an extra hour or two added to each day. One of my wise friends pointed out that then there would just be an extra hour or two of work added to each day. So true.

Every day I feel so completely stretched. Every day I plan on doing ten million things. And I always seem to come up shy of accomplishing one.

I have absolutely no time for myself. But yet I spend countless hours a day "wasting" my time away on the computer. At the moment it's researching every aspect of cloth diapering and making training pants.

Spending time on the computer is easy. And I can get up and down and go here and there and do it all sporadically while feeding kids and wrangling toddlers and answering a gazillion questions from an almost 5 year old.

It's almost impossible to find the time to actually sew any of the diapers/covers/trainers I'm researching and purchasing online to make. So many days I've gotten something cut out and sit down to sew and then it becomes crazy time and as soon as I have things calmed down it's time to start dinner. And with my husband the way he is - I can't do a thing in the evenings. It sucks. It's one of his few flaws - everyone has them. I'll take his flaws most days above other husbandly flaws I've come up against. But I hate it nonetheless.

We had a huge fight about it over the weekend. Because I'm in total burnout mode. I'm desperate for some time to get anything accomplished. Some husbands actually come home from work and play with or spend a little time with their kids. Some husbands let their wives get some kind of relief. Some kind of rest from having to do it all. I swear I feel like a single parent most of the time.

It might help you to know that we live in a remote area. I have no friends or neighbors or family near. He has family around here, but they are older and don't have kids and we don't really socialize with them much. Not like I would have expected when we moved up here. (On a big distracted side note, I am soooo desperate to take a road trip to visit my family - I haven't been able to go back for a visit in a year. But we can't afford it and I'm seriously bummed!). So we have no one to babysit or anything like that...

So - long story shortened because my kids are getting crazy (how I wish I actually had time to write more often!)....

The argument helped a little bit. The other night after all the kids were successfully asleep and in bed at a decent hour, I drug out the sewing table and machine and started in on a diaper I had cut out weeks ago. I expected my husband to get mad. But he actually pitched in and helped. He's the sewer in the family ;) It was a nice surprise. So I'm glad we had the big blow out.

3 comments:

Christie said...

Sigh. I'm in burnout mode myself. I think a weekend away--just me--would be the most awesome thing ever.

Christy said...

Sounds like my life. I feel like the computer is such a time suck and I spend a lot of time looking up projects and buying fabric to sew them and can't find the time to follow through. My husband also does not provide much relief when he's at home (including weekends). I need a vacation. Fortunately I'm headed to my parents in a week so I'll get a little bit of a break! Hope you get a bit of a break soon! Just wanted to let you know that I understand how you feel!

Kathy said...

I feel like the computer is such a time suck and I spend a lot of time looking up projects and buying fabric to sew them and can't find the time to follow through. My husband also does not provide much relief when he's at home (including weekends).

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