After waiting for my husband to come for for about 45mins, he called to say he was still stuck at work :) so maybe I can squeeze a real post in here after all :)
If you are here for the award, scroll down! :)
So I've been thinking a lot these past couple of weeks about pregnancies. For obvious reasons. I'm comparing it to the last one for anxiety reasons. And in hindsight, I really didn't have too many pregnancy symptoms last time. I was constipated, peeing a little more often, and just a little hungrier. But otherwise, I didn't even feel pregnant. I guess it didn't concern me last time because I didn't remember feeling all that pregnant with either of my two other babies.
But now? I remember feeling exactly like I'm feeling now when I was pregnant with my baby girl (my second baby). I am starving my butt off constantly. Last time, I would eat seconds at dinner, but I wasn't spending every waking hour scarfing up everything I could lay my hands on! And I've started feeling nauseous at night. And nauseousness is a good thing. OK, so it doesn't feel all that great, but it is a good indication of a well established pregnancy. The first night I started feeling nauseous, I was hesitantly feeling better about this pregnancy... but thinking maybe it was just something I ate... but now I've been nauseous for about three days straight! And I'm outgrowing my pants already! So I just can't help but feel good. Of course I'm still full of anxiety, but I know that I wasn't feeling anywhere near this pregnant last time.
It is killing me not being able to tell anyone! Well, of course I told you guys ;) But we are waiting to tell family until we are sure that everything is going OK. I will admit that I did tell my mom. Who doesn't blab to their mom right away? I still can't keep secrets from her. And knowing that she can't keep a secret, I finally broke down and told one of my sisters. It was maybe a week later than when I told my mom. And my sister said that my mom kept asking her if she'd talked to me, so she was thinking something was up. Too funny. And once my mom knew that I told my little sister, she just couldn't wait to tell my other sister... so I'm sure by now my entire family knows. But I won't tell my husband that :) And I actually talked to his sister for an hour yesterday and managed to keep my mouth shut about it! That was no easy feat!
I need to really watch myself though - we haven't told Tweenie yet. Because of last time. She was really excited about having another baby, and was pretty upset about the miscarriage. Last night while we were trick-or-treating I almost blabbed to a complete stranger in front of Tweenie! That would have been awful! Tell a stranger before your own daughter? I so need to just tape my big mouth shut! But I'm thinking that she's going to be able to guess here pretty soon, as my pants are no longer fitting...
The really sucky thing about not being able to tell anyone, is that every time I've been pregnant there's been some reason for not blabbing to everyone immediately.
The first time I was pregnant, I found out on the same day that my step-dad died. It was one of the best and worst days of my life. My step-dad had passed out at home after having passed out at work, they were headed to his Dr's. The next day I took the test at my mom's before we left for the hospital. I didn't want to take the test at home. Anyway, long story short, later that night was when they decided to take him off life support, and he passed right after. If I would have known, I never would have taken the test that day. I just know that my step-dad would have really gotten a kick out of my little man. I know he would have doted over him. Needless to say, we waited a while to tell my family. Just bad timing.
The second time I was pregnant, I was starting to think I was pregnant right after my little sister's dad passed away and she was going through a miscarriage. That was another awful time for my family. And again, I waited a while to tell my family. And then I waited even longer to tell my baby sister. And even when I did tell her, I felt just awful. With our first babies, we were pregnant at the same time, we had our first babies just two months apart. I so wanted to be pregnant with her again. She ended up having her second baby nine months after I had mine :)
And the last time? Well, we told everyone right away. Even though we found out that one of my husband's close cousins had passed away the same day. And his brother had just passed away a few weeks before. His family was thrilled though - with all the loss, they were so happy to be having another addition.
And that would be the down side of telling everyone right away... because then we ended up having to call and tell everyone the bad news. Those were some of the worst phone calls I've ever had to make.
Anyway, I don't know how long I can wait to tell everyone! How long should I wait? 10 weeks? 12 weeks? I'm thinking 10 weeks, because 12 weeks is just so long! I guess I'm already about halfway there - I will be six weeks along tomorrow. The funny thing is that at six weeks along with baby girl was when I started outgrowing my pants! I thought maybe it was twins since I was getting bigger quicker. But I guess after your first one you get bigger quicker :)
Well, I'll just be sitting here eating everything in sight and trying like crazy to keep my big mouth shut!
Damn that Halloween candy.
I mean seriously, it is just astounding how hungry I have been. I've even eaten stuff off the high chair after baby girl is done eating. As long as it hasn't already been slobbered on too much.
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